Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Royally Messed Up

I’m not sure how I feel. In fact, I haven’t been sure how I feel for almost a week now. Last week Aaron and I got hit with some pretty troubling news and even though I’m trying to get past it (I’m sure he is too); this whole thing is just staying in my head and messing me up.

Aaron and I went out with some friends. We were supposed to do a dinner and a show –a comedy show to be exact, but more on that later. I was running late because of work so we had to skip dinner and meet our friends at the comedy club. We saw Rich Vos; a comedian we all like a lot. Great show. But that wasn’t the part that got me all messed up. That happened immediately after the show.

Basically, this is what happened: The show ended, we milled around while we got ready to head out, bought a cd, got a picture and walked out. Then, there- right in the parking lot in lieu of what should have been your basic, ‘okay, what do we do now’s’ and/or ‘we’ll see you guys later’s’ we got hit with one of our friends saying, “there’s a reason we wanted you guys to come out.” The tone was serious and the next few words lead me to think they were having financial issues and had to sell their house, but nope. It got worse, the friend followed up the selling the house thing with “we’ve been having problems for a while now,” and the doozy… they are going to be getting divorced.

That was the very first time I have ever seen Aaron be entirely unsure of what to say. All I was able to do is fish through my purse for a pack of tissues because our friend’s wife had started crying.

The whole situation was just odd. Particularly because out of all the married couples we know, this is the one that we genuinely love as a couple. The fact that they got married was essentially a given considering how awesome they are together. Granted, no, we’re not there to see the good, the bad, and the ugly of everyday life, but still. They showed absolutely no sign at all that something was amiss. On the contrary, the time before this, they seemed to be more together than ever. So in the days since then, we’ve discovered that this is a one sided thing. She is going along with this because she has already tried everything she can think of and just wants him to be happy.

Again, I have no idea what to say. During the car ride home, all Aaron and I wanted to do is hug Baby Girl. We were both in shock—and pretty much still are—but mostly felt like we were in mourning. We’re not sure what’s going to happen from this point forward. I have a feeling she will stay in the area since she likes it where she is and works in the city. Him, I’m not sure. She was the bigger bread winner so, I suppose he’ll move on somehow.

It’s funny, I thought I’d be able to wrap my head around this a little better once I got it down on “paper,” but in reality, it really hasn’t helped. I am as confused and bummed as before. I just hope we don’t end up losing two great friends in the process. That would be the biggest shame of it all.


Dizzy Vizzy said...

Oh geez - a tough situation for all involved. I really hope that you get to keep both of them as friends!

Jack said...

Sometimes all you can do is stand aside and hope for the best... And maybe work for it a little bit, too. As a perfect stranger, all I can offer is my Taoist philosophy, that every disaster opens an opportunity, but it is up to you (and your friends) to find it for yourself.

Actually, the reason I stopped by is this: I'm trolling blogs looking for new friends this morning, and a look at the books, movies, and much of the music on your profile suggests that we might have something to talk about. I am 63 years old, have been happily married for 36 of those, and am not out looking for an Internet Girlfriend (whatever that is...). Just some occasional conversation about mutual interests. I'm going to follow you for a while and see what transpires. I invite you to visit me at, and see whether anything I'm doing interests you. Meanwhile, best of luck with your situation. I hope you find some peaceful center.